radiation treatment week 4 – have my prayers to God been answered?

Week four of radiation treatment for prostate cancer begins in a few hours. Last week I wrote about time to give thanks. About prayers to God. When God answers our prayers, we do give thanks. Don’t we? But do we always recognize when and how He answers our requests?

radiation treatment week 4 - have my prayers to God been answered? is article #21 in the series: Do not waste your cancer. Click button to view titles for entire series

I suspect the answer is yes and no.

After talking with some people I realized I need to add more to that thought.

One of the ways a prayer was answered even surprised me.

The first three are the “normal” answers that we think of. But it’s the fourth one that really surprised me. And pretty much everyone I talked to. But let’s start with the more obvious ones.

My prayers to God

So, what did I ask God for?

• To watch over the doctors, nurses, and other members of my care team.
• For little to no side effects from the radiation.
• For eradication of the cancer.

And then I asked others to pray for the same things. Here’s a bit more on the details of each of these items. After all, if we don’t know what we’re really asking for, we’re missing things. Important things.

Sure, God knows what’s in our hearts. Why we ask for the things we ask for. But it’s also good for us to know. To look at ourselves and know why we’re asking for certain things.

But it’s also part of what we call our “witness”. When we ask others to pray for us, and why, we’re also (hopefully) showing something of how we follow Jesus’ teachings. Being the light that helps others do the same.

So, with that in mind, here’s what I asked for. Then, later, we’ll look at how God answered.

To watch over the doctors, nurses, and other members of my care team.

Watching over the care team is a pretty normal thing to pray for. That God will guide the doctors, surgeons, nurses, and everyone else involved so we get the best possible care.

For little to no side effects from the radiation.

The possible side effects from radiation are many. Most won’t happen to the majority of people. I had reasons for this beyond the desire to not experience negative reactions because they’re not comfortable. My prayer was that I be able to continue to write, especially this series and at least some of the normal things I do, and that I continue to be able to lead classes at church.

For eradication of the cancer.

If you’ve read the series Prayer For Healing, then you know there’s a condition attached to this prayer request.

That condition is that my prayer for healing is in line with God’s will. Realistically, we do not and cannot know whether God’s will is for us to be healed or not. More on that later. However, we do know that we should want our will to match God’s will. As such, for this one, I always include that reality in my prayers. Plus, either way, God’s presence and peace being felt, regardless of the outcome, is part of it. Again, more on that later.

How am I doing as week four begins?

Physically, I feel pretty good. Of course, that’s tempered by what could be, rather than what is. It could be much worse. I still have to be careful what I eat. Many of my favorites appear to be off the menu for at least five or six more weeks.

Mentally, I feel much better than I would have expected several years ago. Spending a week in the hospital and another 5 weeks with a staph infection really changes your outlook on things.

Spiritually, I feel awesome. Much more to come on that as we go along.

Have my prayers to God been answered?

God giving me what I asked for

Watching over my care team

I have to say yes on this one. Everyone from the team in the radiation treatment room seems to know what they’re doing. Things always go smoothly. Very efficient.

The radiation oncologist also seems to be very good. He always asks if I have questions, if I want to know more about what’s going on in the process, and stuff like that.

For both of them though, as long as things appear to be going well, and I have good feelings about what’s happening, I’m happy. I look at it this way. My regular doctor told me I have white-coat-itis. Fear of people in white coats. Doctors. He explains a certain amount to me – even drawing chemical diagrams as he explains things.

And then says to keep him informed and trust him.

It makes sense. If I pray for God to watch over my care team, and I have a natural fear of that team, why shouldn’t I trust God?

Side effects

While the side effects I do have are annoying, as I mentioned in previous weeks, that’s all they are. There’s no permanent effect from them. Normally, I can eat pretty much anything. Now occasional diarrhea, some nausea, and stuff like that if I eat what I want instead of what I’ve learned is OK – I can live with that.

I get a bit tired by the end of the week. But if I lay down every afternoon for an hour or so, listen to music, have Mikey (my probably malti-poo) taking a nap on top of me, I do OK.

In any case, none of that has stopped me from leading classes at church. Obviously, there’s not as much time for writing, but I still get some done.

Eradication of cancer

I won’t have any idea whether this is working or not for at least another four months from now. There’s five more weeks of treatment. Then, a three month wait before a blood test to see if it’s gone. That would be a PSA test of 0.000.

But that’s OK. Remember, as Christians, our goal is to align our will with God’s. If His will is for me to be completely healed, awesome. But even if He doesn’t do that, it’s still awesome. He’s with me now, through this. And He’ll be with me forever after that. What more could I ask for?

Things God Said No To

I don’t see anything where God actually said no.

To me, it means I’ve probably done a pretty good job on that part about aligning my will with His.

The passage below is one that stuck with me ever since I was in grade school. I remember wanting the father Jesus spoke of, instead of the one I had. Even when I was mad at God, and left Him for too long, the memory of this brought me back.

Ask, Seek, Knock – Matthew

7:7-11 pp — Lk 11:9-13

Mt 7:7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Mt 7:9 “Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.”

It took a long time to realize what Jesus meant by Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. As I alluded to earlier, it’s not literally anything/everything we ask for. God isn’t a magic genie. It’s when we listen to the Holy Spirit, and align our will with God’s, then we will receive what we ask for, because we have learned to ask for the things that are best for us.

Huh? How do we know that this alignment of wills is always the best?

It’s a bit long, but check this out:

The Shepherd and His Flock

Jn 10:1 “I tell you the truth, the man who does not enter the sheep pen by the gate, but climbs in by some other way, is a thief and a robber. 2 The man who enters by the gate is the shepherd of his sheep. 3 The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. 4 When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. 5 But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger’s voice.” 6 Jesus used this figure of speech, but they did not understand what he was telling them.

Jn 10:7 Therefore Jesus said again, “I tell you the truth, I am the gate for the sheep. 8 All who ever came before me were thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not listen to them. 9 I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out, and find pasture. 10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

Jn 10:11 “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. 12 The hired hand is not the shepherd who owns the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it. 13 The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep.

Jn 10:14 “I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— 15 just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep. 16 I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd. 17 The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life—only to take it up again. 18 No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again. This command I received from my Father.”

Pay special attention to this part: The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

when we follow Jesus, through His Holy Spirit, we will ask for the things that lead us to the full life, the best possible life, that He promised us. It’s an easy thing to say. It’s been a much harder thing to believe and to trust. But it’s so worth it to learn and to do it.

Things where God said wait – not yet

I guess the only thing that clearly falls into this category is knowing how the treatment is progressing. I was hoping for periodic blood tests during the treatment. Apparently, that’s not going to happen. Even the post-treatment blood test doesn’t come until three months after it’s over.

Asking God for more blood tests isn’t as bad as asking Him to make a square circle. It’s not even close. But still, God created us according to His rules of biology, life, and whatever else is involved in making us. And if His rules say there’s no point in doing something, why should we be asking Him to do something different?

Has God given me more than I asked for?

Now we reach the point where I got more than I asked for. Something I just kind of went with. I was grateful and thankful for it. But I didn’t realize just how special it was until I talked about it with some other people. I even wrote about this before.

What am I talking about? The folks in the radiation treatment room. They are, in a word, fun.

On my first day, when they did some scans to set up the computer program for treatment, one of the guys told me that I’d get so sick if coming in five days a week for eight weeks. That I’d even get sick of seeing the people.

I cannot imagine getting sick of seeing the people. If anything, on the last day, I expect it’ll be a sad day, because it’ll be the last time I see them. I think I’ll miss them. If you’ve read much about me, you know how strange and unexpected that feeling is.

So back to more than I expected. After talking to a few people, I feel like maybe I took that too much for granted. Or maybe other people don’t expect much from God? Or, at least not enough?

Those folks are so much fun, I just assumed they’re a gift from God. Something to help me not only survive the treatment, but to flourish trough it. I mean, I’m trusting Him to take care of me, to keep me on the path that leads to eternity with Him. If God knows I need people like that, then, of course, He will provide them. And I am thankful to Him for them.

But a few other people said things like they never even thought of asking for something like that. The truth is, neither did I. But I did recognize that, if all good things come from God, then He brought us together.

In a way, it reminds me of when Jesus healed the ten lepers. It opens up a whole new meaning of that event for me.

First, here’s what happened.

Ten Healed of Leprosy

Lk 17:11 Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. 12 As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance 13 and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”

Lk 17:14 When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed.

Lk 17:15 One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. 16 He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.

Lk 17:17 Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? 18 Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?” 19 Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.”

I used to read this and think about how nine of the ten didn’t even know God. Yeah, they did think Jesus could heal them of their leprosy. But they had no clue that He could save their souls and give them eternal life.

But now, it seems there’s more to it. Something that’s a whole lot more hopeful than 90% of the people don’t have a clue about God.

Maybe it also shows a lack of understanding about what Jesus can do. Or maybe saying a lack of appreciation for what Jesus does do for us.

I interact with the folks in the radiation treatment room and thank God for their presence. At least, I do it now. I wonder, how far back do I have to go before that thought wouldn’t have occurred to me?

Sadly, I don’t think it would be all that far. My guess is that it’s the time I spent in the hospital with the staph infection that got me to appreciate the doctors and nurses treating me. There were at least ten doctors, that I know of. Could’ve been more. And who knows how many nurses and techs. And again, everyone was so nice.

I dare say though, if it wasn’t for how much trouble I was in physically, I don’t think I would’ve noticed. That was when I realized, for the first time, how God really does use bad things for our good.

So now, in the middle of the cancer treatments, I notice the care team right away. And I’m thankful to God for them.

But let’s get back to the ten lepers.

One was both healed and saved, because he came back to give thanks and glory to God.

I truly believe that the care team played a part in my getting through the staph infection. I easily get depressed. The complete peacefulness of those weeks in the hospital and then doing an in-home portable IV line giving me periodic antibiotics under the care of a nurse who came by the house a couple times a week was striking. God’s peace, to be sure. But the people, and my attitude towards them, helped a lot.

It’s the same now with the radiation treatments. I firmly believe they will have an impact on how I get through the treatments. And on the eventual outcome of them.

But the question remains, who is saved? I think I’m already saved. So it’s not me. However, what about people who read this? What about someone who wouldn’t have given God thanks before, but will now? Will my experience, and writing this, play even a small part in saving someone?

That would be so awesome. It’s God making something turn out for good, when many would look at what’s happening and think, that’s awful.

Conclusion – radiation treatment week 4 – have my prayers to God been answered?

Have my prayers been answered? Absolutely. Even the ones I didn’t ask.

But more importantly, have your prayers been answered, by reading this? Even the prayers you didn’t ask.

Maybe you even learned something about a God you didn’t know about, or didn’t believe in?

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