What have I done?

Do you think Jesus ever said, “Oh No!  What have I done?”

We were at the Christmas eve service at our church – the music was really nice – violin and piano as the main instruments – so I thought I’d just sit and quietly pray instead of singing. And that question came to me.  

So I’m asking Jesus – did you ever say “Oh No!! What have I done!!??  These people – they’re aren’t worth this!”

“Maybe it was when you were first born?  Laying there in that manger.  Not a five star establishment – although there was that one star up in the sky.  Were you already thinking it was a mistake.  Maybe you shouldn’t have agreed to it?

“Maybe when you were twelve – and you’re in the temple.  You were there to learn – but the people were amazed at Your answers, instead of the other way around.  Certainly, by then, you must have realized something was wrong.

“Maybe after that – as you were growing up – and got exposed to more of us.  I mean – watching us from Heaven is one thing – but actually being here – being one of us – and being among us – when did you realize exactly what we’re really like?”

Somewhere along the line here – I’ve got tears running from my eyes.  We talk / sing about how Jesus came from Heaven to be a baby, but really praying / talking to Him about it – it makes it “real”.

“Maybe by the time you reached 29 – before starting your ministry – you must have had second thoughts.  Like maybe you’d rather just live out the rest of your life quietly.

“Certainly after starting your ministry – when we weren’t getting it – especially when the disciples weren’t getting it – You must have been so frustrated.  By then You had to be wondering – what am I doing?  I knew it was going to be like this.  Why did I ever let Father talk me into this!?”

And then the answer came to me  – No!
It’s not like it was anything audible – but it was clearly an answer of No!

And I’m thinking – No? 

The answer – No! Never.

And I still have trouble with that answer.  No? Really?

No!  Never!  Because I know what you could be!

 

That was a special service.  A reminder – He didn’t come because of what we are like – but because of what we could be.  What we could be without the influence of Satan.

What we think about the world we live in – corrupted by Satan – speaks volumes about where we stand in our relationship with Jesus.  If we like this world – as is – we probably don’t really care much about Jesus – because we like things as they are.  But if we feel like things should be better – then we probably do care about Jesus.  Because He actually knows what we hope to be true – that things can and will be better.  Thanks to Him.